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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27451189">Falling apart (but it will come back together)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account'>orphan_account</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Feels, First Kiss, It gave me a 79, Iwaizumi Hajime is bad at expressing his, Love Confessions, M/M, Oikawa Tooru is Bad at Feelings, Oikawa Tooru is a Mess, Pining kinda, as good as i can get it i guess, but thats okay, i dont know punctuation 😃, i used gramarly to edit this, rated t for cussing</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 16:20:48</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,550</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27451189</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Every time Oikawa was around Iwa-chan he felt safe and happy.  Ever since Oikawa met Iwa-chan his life was brighter. Even if Iwaizumi wasn't the nicest or would lash out, Oikawa was still happy because Iwaizumi was there. Every time those forest green eyes met his chestnut eyes he felt his heart ache and stomach twist. Oikawa probably should have figured this out sooner. It was quite obvious, when ever Oikawa saw Hajime his heart rate jumped and all he felt was a joy. But when he finally came to the realization, he felt his world fall apart.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>30</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Falling apart (but it will come back together)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hi, this is my very first fic. I would like you to tell me what I need to work on!<br/>I hope its not as bad as I think it is, so enjoy. Constructive criticism would be appreciated!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Every time Oikawa was around Iwa-chan he felt safe and happy. Ever since Oikawa met Iwa-chan his life was brighter. Even if Iwaizumi wasn't the nicest or would lash out, Oikawa was still happy because Iwaizumi was there. Every time those forest green eyes met his chestnut eyes he felt his heart ache and stomach twist. Oikawa probably should have figured this out sooner. It was quite obvious, when ever Oikawa saw Iwaizumi his heart rate jumped and all he felt was joy. But when he finally came to the realization, he felt his world fall apart.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I'm in love with Iwa-chan? I cant be! I can't be!</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He felt hot tears pool in his eyes. Oikawa felt his heart clench in discomfort as cold despair crept its way into his chest. He couldn't possibly be in love with Iwa-chan, he couldn't.</span>
</p><p><br/>
</p><p><br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Ever since he realized, he tried desperately to destroy his feelings. He did so by opting out of hangouts and making excuses. But that only made his longing stronger. After a few weeks of Oikawa keeping a distance and not being his usual cheerful and outgoing self, people started noticing. He was not doing his best in volleyball and every time Iwaizumi came up to talk to him, he barely made eye contact and answered in short quick words. </span>
</p><p><br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Oikawa walked by and he felt Iwaizumi’s eyes on him, he then felt tapping on his shoulder and he turned and saw Iwaizumi behind him. He immediately looked away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Yes?" Oikawa asked quietly. Iwaizumi looked at him with an odd look, he looked determined and concerned.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Oikawa," Iwaizumi said in a firm voice, "I would like to talk with you after practice." Oikawa simply nodded. Still refusing to make eye contact, trying to look at anything but those intense green eyes. Iwaizumi eyes narrowed then he turned and started warm-ups.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Oikawa was dreading the talk. He's been avoiding Iwaizumi, it’s obvious. He just hoped that practice would go longer than usual. But the universe hates Oikawa and decided to keep it at the normal length. Oikawa tried his best to stall and clean up slow, he even changed slowly hoping Iwaizumi decided to leave because of how long he was taking. But of course, Oikawa had no luck. Oikawa walked out and his eyes landed on Iwaizumis figure leaning against the side of the gym. Oikawa walked past him and Iwaizumi followed. Oikawa was afraid of the silence but he also feared what was to come.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Oikawa." Spoke Iwaizumi, peering over at Oikawa trying to make eye contact but Oikawa immediately looked away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Yes?" asked Oikawa nervously.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"What wrong?" Oikawa's face flashed guilt and fear, but he quickly changed it to a fake smile. Hajime of course caught his previous expression. Iwaizumis eyes narrowed and a visible frown formed on his lips.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Nothing." Said Oikawa cooly. Oikawa hoped that Iwaizumi couldn’t tell that he was lying, Oikawa gave his fake smile one more go. But that only made Iwaizumi study him closer with suspicious eyes. Oikawa felt Iwaizumis eyes on him and it felt like he was being looked at for eternity but it was only a few seconds. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Don't bull shit me," Imaizumi said coldly. Oikawa's fake smile fell immediately into a pout.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I-I'm not," Said Oikawa with his voice cracking just slightly, and that somehow even made Imaizumi even more pissed, and the way his eyes narrowed even more made him look menacing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Stop lying,” he demanded, "You've been not hanging around with our group, you've been not doing the best in volleyball, and that only happens when there’s seriously something wrong. You haven't been your usual cheery annoying self and you have been avoiding me." Oikawa only looked down. "So stop fucking around, and tell me what's wrong." Iwaizumis' voice turned slightly softer at the end of the sentence. Oikawa felt tears fill his eyes he tried to blink them away but to no avail. He then felt his arm being pulled, forcing Oikawa to stop walking. Oikawa let out a frustrated what!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Tooru, tell me what's wrong," Hajime then saw the tears drop from Oikawa's pretty face onto the ground. "Shit- Tooru what's wrong, please tell me," pleaded Iwaizumi but Oikawa stayed quiet and kept his watery gaze on the ground. "Tooru look at me and tell me what's wrong." It was a simple request, yet Oikawa was still hesitant. Oikawa finally lifted his face, watering eyes meeting steely green ones. Oikawa let out a shaky breath then said:</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I'm a fool Hajime, I'm a goddamn fool," Oikawa sounded broken.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You're not a foo-" started Iwaizumi only to be cut-off by Oikawa.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I AM THOUGH! I feel so sad all the time. I tried to cut off my feelings but it only made things worse! I don't fucking know what I'm going to do! I don’t feel like myself anymore!" Oikawa yelled while tears streamed down his face. Iwaizumi reached up and wiped them away then pulled his hand away. </span>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Don't make things worse Hajime, don’t give me hope.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Hajime was staring at him with a very concerned face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Oikawa tell me what's wrong," </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I can't," said Oikawa quickly, he then let out a few shaky breaths.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Please tell m-"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"FINE IWA-CHAN! IM IN LOVE! I'm in love, can you fucking believe it!! I love someone I can never have and they would never feel the same way that I do." he sounded hysterical "I want them so so so bad. They're always on my mind, I wish I could just stop. It's destroying me. SO tell me I'm not a fool Hajime! I'm just an annoying mess that fell for their best friend." Tooru was sobbing at this point, body shaking face wet with tears. Hajime's eyes widened, shock written all over his face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I-what?" Asked Hajime, clearly confused.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"ITS YOU HAJIME! ITS ALWAYS BEEN YOU! Once I realized, I thought about how I was so screwed. I tried so hard to ignore how I felt, I even distanced myself from you but it only made things worse." Tooru's shaking increased and his eyes fell to the ground afraid of the reaction. "It's okay if you don't want to talk to me anymore," said Tooru quietly with tears in his eyes. If Tooru wasn't looking at the ground at that moment he would have seen the small smile that made its way onto Hajimes lips and how Hajime's eyes softened.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Shitty-kawa," Hajime said softly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Nows not the time for names! So just leave and don't mock me!" Tooru said sounding broken. He felt more tears fill his eyes. This would be the last time he would see Hajime, thought Tooru sadly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tooru heard a soft chuckle. That made Tooru even sadder because he would never hear it again. Then warm hands cupped his Tooru's face and tilted his face up. He then felt a pair of lips push against his own. Tooru froze with shock. Hajime’s lips started moving and Tooru somehow kissed back. Tooru’s arms went around Hajime’s neck and pulled him closer. Hajime smiled into the kiss and then parted, Hands dropping by his side, the smile still very much present. Seeing that beautiful smile and knowing that he caused it, made Tooru dizzy. All Tooru could do was smile back, his eyes were still wet, but with happy tears.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I don't understand," said Tooru still shocked by the events that just occurred. Hajime kept smiling.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Oh god, please don't stop smiling, </span>
  </em>
  <span>thought Oikawa as warmth ceased his body. Tooru then felt a pair of warm hands hold his own.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You don't have to understand, but understand this. I love you, I love you so much. I think I've loved you since middle school. You make me feel a way no one else can make me feel. Whenever you smile my life gets brighter, when you laugh it sounds like angels, I know that sounds cliche but that's just how it is. When your around everything is better. I know I haven't shown you how much you mean to me. But from now on, every day until I die I will show you how much I love you. I am sorry that I haven't been expressive with how I feel and that it has caused you to feel unhappy but I swear I will make it up to you, Oikawa Tooru will you go out with me?" Said Hajime with a determined look. Tooru just stood in shock, he finally willed himself to do something and he grabbed Hajime's shirt and pulled him into a hug, burying his face into Hajime neck as tears of joy slipped down his face onto Hajime's shirt. Hajime's arms made their way behind Tooru rubbing soothing circles. Hajime chuckled.</span>
</p><p>
  <span> "So, is this a yes?" Asked Hajime looking amused. Tooru met his gaze and Tooru smile grew even more</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Yes, you idiot." Mumbled Tooru fondly into Hajime’s neck. Hajime kept smiling and hugged Tooru.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You're my world Tooru." Said Hajime in a voice like he was stating facts. That made Tooru’s heart beat faster and he felt his face grow red. Tooru just felt so happy and grateful for what just happened. As quickly as his world fell apart, it came back together.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"And you are mine." </span>
</p><p>
  
</p><p><br/>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks for giving my writing a look!! I hope you enjoyed it. Constructive criticism would be appreciated!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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